Let's admit it! Saying "till death do us part" is a lot simpler than doing it.
Simply ask the 40 to 50 percent of married partners in the United States who wind up divorcing.
Marriage can be a rollercoaster ride. As much as people love the idea of marriage, there are times when they may struggle to deal with its highs and lows and think about ending it. However, you must know that divorce is not always the best solution. Here are some ways to work around the problems and avoid divorce:
Don't Entirely Pin Your Faith On Your Partner
Your hubby may be your absolute favorite person to spend time with. Besides, he's dependable (who else would massage your back for an hour while you devour your favorite ice cream from the shop you love?). However, it is advisable that you proceed with caution.
In essence, putting too much reliance on your one-and-only can put undue strain on your relationship, which it may not be able to endure.
Be Head and Shoulders Above
It's a good idea to give your partner some space and spend some time away from them. You may choose to spend time with your friends, pursue a hobby, or just enjoy being alone for a while. Giving each other a break is healthy for your relationship. It can also make you crave each other's company and attention.
Stir it Up Whenever You Can (Mostly in Bed)
Anyone who has been married for more than a few years knows how difficult it is to keep the excitement pumped up over the years. It's all about the struggle amid yearning and love. Love likes to know everything there is to know about you and your significant other; desire craves mysteries.
Eroticism is blunted by recurrence, whereas intimacy strengthens with habituation and familiarity. It survives on the enigmatic, unusual, and unanticipated.
The difference between love and desire is that love is about selfless devotion, and desire is about an unquenched want, so make sure you keep things steamy by trying out new things to pique your partner's interest.
Lack of Comprehension
As a manifestation of yearning, natural desire necessitates a state of ambiguity. It is more preoccupied with where it can still proceed than where it has really gone.
But, all too frequently, once a couple has settled into the pleasures of love, they stop stoking the desired fire.
They overlook the fact that fire requires air to turn into an inferno. So, do something entirely unexpected, spontaneous. Recreate the sensual desire you both shared when you first began dating to delight your significant other.
Purchase a pair of enticing new undies. Whatever it is, it doesn't matter as long as it is sensual enough and guarantees to arouse your partner.
Perhaps the most vital relationship will also have its due bit of late-night arguments, yelling tantrums, and conflicts if you're in it for the long haul.
What is the most critical thing worth noting? That you don't wait for the other to apologize, regardless of who was to blame.
There's nothing cowardly or demeaning about apologizing. The one who offers an apology upfront is typically the bigger person and has a moral high ground. Apologies can ensure that the union does not turn into an unhappy marriage.
Try to relax
It's certainly the last thing you wish to undertake, yet if you intend to start working on how to preserve your marriage life from divorce, you need to do it straight away.
Don't rush to an attorney's office, notify all your pals, or go on a booze spree because you're angry or afraid.
Simply take a breather and consider what you're doing.
Staying tolerant with yourself and your partner is part of the first guideline on safeguarding your marriage life from divorce.
Make vital innovations
Whenever the term "divorce" is mentioned, it generally means that one or both parties of the married couple are dissatisfied with something.
The most effective treatment is to alter something you are doing or not doing. Rise up and reassure your partner that you are willing to put in the effort to improve your relationship.
How can you keep your marriage from ending in divorce? There are many small yet effective ways to make things better with your partner. Plan a trip for them, and take them somewhere they have always wanted to go. Repair the sliding door that has to be repaired. Wake up early and make their favorite breakfast for them. Ensure you make those small loving gestures and put the love you feel for them into action by constantly trying to please them and taking care of their wants and needs. You loving them each day is one of the best ways to sustain a marriage, and it will encourage them to reciprocate the gestures, strengthening your bond.
Zoom in on the positives of your spouse
This is one of the most difficult guidelines to observe. Either your partner has committed something to put your marriage life in jeopardy, or perhaps your relationship has grown bumpy due to overall unhappiness.
Don't express outrage in any case. Dwelling on the unpleasant leads people to become reactive. Alternatively, concentrate on your partner's excellent qualities.
Generate a checklist and keep it with you at all times. Refresh your list whenever negative feelings about your marriage arise.
If 'love' evolves, don't fear
You generally agree with someone you love and adore everything about them, right? No.
It's a lot more intricate than that when it comes to love. Love is not just flowers and butterflies in your tummy. It's direct involvement with all sorts of sentiments, both pleasant and primordial, as well as unpleasant ones.
After six months of marriage, your love for your partner will most likely feel very different than it does after a year. But there's nothing problematic with that at all.
Never compare your relationship
Your former college roommate just got married, and her marriage ceremony looked beautiful, and she appears to be in love.
However, you're behind on payments, your kid won't stop wailing, and your husband has spent the last 4 hours playing video games. Sigh.
What's the ideal strategy to rekindle your romance? Take your phone away from you. Get off social media for a few weeks if all else is doubtful.
The sabbatical will enable you to realize how exhausting it is to try to be someone else. Simply put, concentrate on being the best version of yourself and remaining present in your own life. Don't compare your relationships with others.
Folks, it's more complicated than it sounds, but you can embrace the challenge with a bit of willpower.
Swallow your pride
Allowing reconciliation and practicing forgiveness is one of the most effective techniques to rescue your marriage from divorce. It is the purest kind of love as well as a catalyst for transformation.
Forgiveness is complex, and it may seem overwhelming at times. But embark on the journey to make things easier for yourself and your partner.
Free yourself from blame
If you make a mistake, it's not the end of the world. You need to be kind to yourself, too. The heaviness lifted from your chest will empower you to go ahead in a healthy manner, and it may even assist your partner in evolving in ways you never imagined.
Get Marriage Counseling
Make counseling a significant commitment if you want to rescue your marriage from divorce. Schedule an appointment with a reputable marriage counselor as soon as feasible.
A skilled marriage counselor can assist you in finding areas of agreement as well as working through long-standing conflicts in a disciplined manner.
You can also track your progress as you proceed to attend sessions. Is it becoming a little easier as time goes on?
Remember to put in the necessary effort during the counseling session and then implement the therapist's advice thereafter.
Marriages frequently lead to divorce as a result of spouses ceasing to communicate.
Over time, they may drift apart and question why they are still married. It can be difficult to make that initial approach and get back on talking terms if you are feeling distant.
Therefore, first and foremost, recall why you married in the first place. What were you speaking about back then?
Since then, what have you chatted about? Express concern for your spouse's top priorities. Make plans to go on dates frequently. If you're lucky, you'll be able to laugh once again. It will assist in softening up your marriage and reignite the lost spark.
Get the help you need
To safeguard and sustain your marriage life from teething troubles in the present time and future, read "7 Ways To What Makes Love Last" by Arturo James Daly today!
The book is also available in Spanish: